This morning, first time in my life (I think) I wrote Morning Pages.
It is just that, you grab a paper and a pen and start writing whatever comes to your mind.
The point is to drain the brain on the paper. And since it is morning, all the guards and filters of the brain are down and one basically thought-vomit on paper.
This clears the brain and undigested thought food comes out.
I learned this method from a book I recently started reading Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. She teaches in this book how can we find our inner artist and/or let it grow.
So, I did the morning pages and the result of the day one was… for much stuff that came out, I am ashamed and amused of it.
I used to think that I am a saint and but turned out that I am just a regular folk. A kind of person if just gets out of my life, I’ll be a lot peaceful. And honestly I have never imagined myself as that person.
Well part of me, I already knew but still what was in front of me was bare core, concentrated, undiluted me.
I think, that perhaps those are just random stuck energy inside me and not actually me. May be it’s not true, may be it is. But definitely it feels like I can see myself a lot more clearly now.
It gave me a lot more insight into myself on just day one. I plan to continue this daily.
But doing this the first thing in the morning required a little courage from me.
I usually sit silently and do nothing for many minutes to sometimes hours. I like that. So pushing morning pages before my “Meditation” was something I was reluctant to do and still am.
But what came out surprised me so much that I should stick it in between.
My feelings are very mixed after this session. I feel very light at one moment, ashamed at another, then in the next like I have found the gold, and in the other I think it was garbage, not the gold that I was carrying. And though I still carry all that, probably, but at least I can now see clearly.
Thanks Julia.
– Niharika Rahi
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